Saturday, November 19, 2011

chapter 4: the river-monster

wolfrock looked into the river, preparing herself for the jump. "it'll be fine," she said to herself. "it'll come naturally."
she jumped. everything seemed to happen in slow motion. sailing through the air, glancing at the black, swirling water below her, suddenly realizing how stupid this was. "oh, why did'nt i just hunt with the other wolves?" she wailed, twisting in a futile attempt to land herself on a rock. with a splash, she crashed into the icy waters. she struck out with front paws, uselessly thrashing in the water, feeling her body go numb. this was the end, she knew it. suddenly she heard a voice, her mother's voice. "you'll be all right, dear, you'll be okay."
"mom?" whispered wolfrock. "help me, mother! please!"
she felt a warm bubble of air, surrounding and supporting her. somehow, it was just the right temperature.
"now wolfrock, dear, try swimming. it's like running, but underwater. you will not drown, i promise."
wolfrock tried it. it was just like her mother said! it was actually really easy! she felt that warm bubble of water slowly dissipate. contrary to her expectations, though, she didn't sink! and with the exercise, she warmed up. the water didn't feel so cold now. she was actually enjoying it.
suddenly she heard a shout.
"wolfrock! no! geet out of the river!"
it was dawn. why was she here? did she like swimming too?
"no!" she replied hotly. "i like swimming too. you can't just kick me out!"
dawn arrived breathlessly at the edge of the river as wolfrock was clambering out.
"it's not that. no one swims here! are you crazy? you could have been attacked by the-"
a huge, scaly ...thing erupted from the river and grabbed dawn. wolfrock caught a glimpse of a red mouth, rows of long teeth bigger than knitting needles, and wide black eyes.
she screamed and started to run. "help me! dawn's been eaten! HELP!"

12 comments:

  1. Great chapter!!

    I am not trying to be annoying, but after every sentence, nothing was capital (sorry, I am not trying to be rude!)

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  2. Nice, Armadillo! I like the plot of the story, in fact it's amazing!

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  3. thanks wolfrock!
    and to answer your question, greatshot, my comuter's totally messed. i can do !@#$^&*() and _, but not capital letters.
    i think it's because of this wierd automatic spell-check my mom installed...
    anyway, that's why. and no, i didnt think you were rude at all. i like people critisizing my work, it tells me what to improve.

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  4. What does it take to become an author, WolfRock12?

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  5. @ amradillousushi

    Thanks for understanding! I want to be an author when I grow up, and I love my work to be critisized, saying if I made any spelling mistakes or something didn't make sense, but I do not like to be told to change a whole paragraph or something like that.

    I want to be an editor AND an author when I grow up. ^.^

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  6. @WolfRock12

    What does it take to become A Full Eclipse author? Because I wanted to become one and I needed to know what I should do to become one.

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  7. yeah wolfrock12.
    even if you dont want any other authors up there, please make a new chapter or something.

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  8. also can i make a new chapter?
    i didnt want to just go ahead and type one but just asking...
    also @greatshot
    if wolfrock's ok with it you can make a chapter in a comment & i'll copy and paste it

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  9. @WolfRock12

    I am allowed to use my dad's e-mail. How should I tell you what it is? Comment on my blog to say what ya think.

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  10. Oh i wish i could post a new chapter but i'm not a mod! :(

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  11. @GreatShot
    Blogger should've sent your father an email. This will allow you to add you;)

    ReplyDelete

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